Home Sweet Home

Yeah Yeah so it has been forever since I have actually took the time to post.  Did I mention that I was a working mom who works about 45 to 50 hours a week, raises two young kids, a dog (don't even get me started on the effort it takes with that one), and who can forget about Stacey. 

This summer we have spent in a whirlwind travel pattern.  If we are not somewhere, we are at the lake.  It started in late June when we took four days down in Branson with the camper and the girls.  We had a blast!  Silver Dollar City was hot, but with water rides and the sprinklers they had going it was very comfortable.  The campground had a pool and we spent a great deal of time there as well.  Since we don't usually go to Branson in the summer we decided to rent a boat on Table Rock Lake.  Wow it was breathtaking.  Such clear water that it seemed like the ocean or a really, really big swimming pool.  The girls were a bit scared (ok well Ella was terrified since we rented a ski boat and she is used to our pontoon and as soon as Stacey took off, the back the boat goes down while the front goes up until you plane out.  The look on her face, the tears, and the screaming that she wanted to go back to the dock was just priceless) I mean after all at our lake you can't see anything let alone your toes straight down.  If there was a way that we could find to get to Table Rock each weekend without it being a 4 hour drive we would so be there. 



Ella singing in the truck



Grace singing in the truck

 After Branson we were home two nights before taking off for the lake four 5 nights.  Have no fear the 100+ temperatures just followed us.  Sure the campground was hot.  Sure you just prayed each second that the air in the camper would not go out, but being out on the water was just delightful.  The lake has to be one of my favorite places to be.  There is nothing to really do except relax (although Stacey who is always fixing something on the camper or boat would disagree) and spend time together.  It also helps that none of my electronic devices works there and for someone who always has her phone on and her ipad around plus a laptop not far away, this alone makes the lake totally worth it.  The highlight had to have been seeing the girls have so much fun with their cousins.  We have two nieces that are just younger then Ella and Grace and to see them act like "big sisters" is so funny.  We tubed, caught lighting bugs, layed and watched the stars, and even took a few bike rides. 

Despite all the travel, I was able to successfully launch a new website, get a 24 page newsletter put together, pack and unpack several times, and my most proud accomplishment, study and pass my Accredited in Public Relations Exam.  So now I should have so much free time on my hands.  Oh wait we are getting ready to leave again on two more trips.   Oh well maybe in the winter :). 

The Students Become the Teacher

As parents, we serve as our children's first teachers.  Stacey and I, with help from our wonderful sitter, taught the girls to crawl, walk, talk, eat, play, and so many more things.  Sometimes we forget that they teach us just as much.

Last summer I took my first step in my accreditation process and passed my APR readiness review panel.  I was in Texas at the time and had the chance to celebrate what I thought was a great review with my MOSPRA colleagues.  A few weeks later I got an official letter of congratulations from the UAB.  Stacey had the girls make me huge signs telling me how proud they were of me.  I used this as a teachable moment to let them know they can do anything if they put their minds too it and work hard.  This brought on the girls wanting to do so many things on their own.  I admit the hardest was perhaps taking their own bath, because really they don't wash the way I want them to and I am a bit of a control freak. 

Fast forward almost 9 months and the girls are trying new things to be "big girls" and do things themselves.  I have learned to let go of control and am really enjoying this new found freedom!  So last week I went for the second part of my accreditation and had to take a computer exam.  Having not really studied or taken a test in 10 years, I will have to say I was nervous.  I had a plan and had been working my study plan for months.  The day before I spent the day studying and the girls used that as a time to "study" too (aka practice writing their numbers and letters).  They were so proud of how much better they were getting.  Grace even said, "See mom a little hard work and I got this."  I was so proud.  From my own study session I had taken two practice tests and gotten a 100% and an 87%.  In Grace's words, I had this!


You can imagine my broken heart when after taking the computer exam I realized that I failed and failed miserably.  Almost two weeks later and I am still not sure what went so wrong.  My best friend Megan knew that I needed to just have some comfort Mexican food.  Stacey knew that I needed a hug and to just let me watch my trashy TV alone.  Mom and Dan knew to just tell me it would be ok.  After a few hours I was content knowing that this computer did not know anything about my skills and really who needed a few letters behind their name anyway.  I had no idea the girls would teach me something that afternoon.

I want to pick them up from the sitter and take them to dance class.  The girls can't remember that I asked them to pick up their toys, but they can remember that mommy took a test and they wanted to hear all about it.  How do you explain to a 5 year old that you tried but just did not do well?  As I working on my explanation of how mommy tried her best, but just could not get it, Grace said, "It's ok mommy you can try again."  Ella said, "I love you mommy and we can help you study your flashcards."  As they brought tears to my eyes, I said, "well girls I don't think that mommy is going to try again."  "But mommy you just need to keep trying like you always tell us," said Ella.  Now how do you respond to I am not going to follow the advice I give you?  I did what any good parent would do and changed the subject. 

Having thought on it now for almost a week, and receiving my official you failed but try again letter, I have decided that I need to be the teacher and show the girls that just because you fail at something the first time does not mean that you can not succeed.  It is not important if you pass or fail, what is important is that you keep trying your best until you get it right and ask for help when you need it.  So girls, mommy signed up to take the APR test again.  She is going to ask for more help and be prepared to see flashcards all over the house!  Lesson heard and learned. 

Is Honesty really the best policy?

Stacey and I have always worked to teach the girls that they need to be honest.  For example, if I asked you to pick up your room and you did not do it, tell me so and I won't be mad.  Lie to me and tell me you picked it up and then the dog messed it up and you will go in timeout and get a punishment.  I should have known that the whole honesty lesson would come back to bit me in the butt. 

It all started on Tuesday morning when our entire house just needed to go back to bed and start the day over because we were so cranky.  We finally made it out of the house, only 10 minutes late, and not really starting the day on a positive note.  On my drive to work Stacey called and said the girls wanted to talk to me.  Ella was very sweet and apologized for not listening like a big girl and for being fussy.  Then she wished me happy valentines day and handed the phone to Grace.  Grace started to say she was sorry and then asked Stacey, "what did you say that I had to tell her again?"  At least she was honest. 

So fast foward to Thursday morning when the three of us girls are getting ready in the bathroom.  Ella asks me, "mom why is your tummy so big?"  My nice response, "because I had two babies and you and sis made my tummy big."  Ella's response, "yeah but we are 5 mom so why is it so big?"  I just changed the subject and thought well at least she is being honest.  Now when you have twins, what one does so must the other.  So enter Grace with her words of wisdom.  As I am putting on my dress, it got caught on my bra strap and I asked Stacey to take a look and help me.  Grace chimes in "mommy why are you wearing a dress that is so small when you are so big?" 

You know sometimes you just have to laugh and move on. 

PS just so you know girls, you too will one day look like your mom and I am here to say that for 33, having had two kids, and such a busy life, I think i look pretty darn good!  On a side note, I will recall these comments and use them with you when you are older....as your Nana jawhawk frequently says to me....Paybacks are hell!

Life through the eyes of a 5 year old

Growing up I was never much into drama.  I had friends that were mostly guys since having friends that were girls seem to come with drama.  I was lucky that my few close girlfriends were much like me and still are.  When we found out we were expecting, Stacey and I both wanted a boy.  When we found out it was twins we thought two boys would be nice or maybe a boy and a girl.  The idea of two girls never crossed our minds until we were told both girls.  Now don't get me wrong, I can't imagine having anything but my precious girls.  I thought I had a few more years until the drama began, but then I had forgotten what it was like to see life though the eyes of a 5 year old. 

By 5 they want to be more independent.  They like to pick out their own clothes and then we have to talk about the concept of matching.  Take for example Sunday when Ella wanted to wear a green and blue plaid skirt that Nana bought her with the blue flowered shirt.  Now in her mind they were both blue so they matched.  Did I mention plaid and flowers.....uh not so much matching.  She ran off in tears.  I know I know mean mom just let her wear what she wants the public will understand that she is 5 and dressed herself.  To be fair I did let her wear her brown skirt with multicolored butterflies to church on Christmas with her teal butterfly shirt and pink cowgirl boots so I feel that once in public with a mismatch outfit was enough (this would also be why there are no pictures of Christmas Day at our house this year). 

I am ready for battles with clothes, the girls being mad that I won't let them wear make-up and bright pink lip stick outside of the house, and the "your mean" comments when they don't get what they want.  What I was not ready for was earlier this week. 

Let me take you back to Tuesday night when the girls had just gotten out of the shower and were picking out pj's.  I hear Grace running back down to the bathroom yelling at Stacey, "you are ruining my life."  I mean really how could that be possible at 5 years old?  Well then it all made since to find out that Grace wanted to wear her summer tutu pj's and Stacey had said no it was too cold :).  After all at 5 and being Grace it is all about wear things that are pink and tutu like.  We quickly got over that with the offering of a snack and life moved out. 

Move along to Wednesday night when both girls wet their pants upon arriving home from preschool.  Grace just waited to long and who knows what Ella's problem was.  Now I found this frustrating seeing as they are 5 and at least Ella has not had an accident in over a year.  The best part was that Ella was up in her room when it happened and then she walked the entire house before coming to the bathroom and changing her clothes.  So as I am cleaning the carpet of the pee spots from her wet socks and dripping clothes, Grace has the nerve to ask me if they can have a coke.  Really kid you just wet your pants and you want me to get you a big girl drink?  I think not.  To which Grace replies, "Mom you are breaking my heart and ruining my life." 

Let it be known that my name is Stephanie Smith and my husband Stacey and I are ruining our daughters lives.  We feed them, dress them, give them shelter, and we try and make sure they are safe and happy.  In doing so we may not give them what they want and thus ruin their little 5 year old lives. 

Ella and Grace this is just the start of many many things we will do for your own good that you will not like so get used to it girly girls! 

PS remember we love you!

Morning Rush Hour

Before we had kids my mornings were so peaceful.  I would wake about 6:00 a.m. and get ready for the day, kiss Stacey goodbye while waking him up about 6:30 and head off to work.  So quite, so peaceful, and just very calm.  Fast forward five years and my days of peace and calm are out the door! So why should I be surprised that I walked out in black pants with brown shoes yesterday?

 Mornings are hard for some people, but it is no surprise why the most stressful part of my day is 5:30-6:45 in the morning.  I get up early just to have 30 minutes of peace to start my day, that is when Ella does not get up with my alarm to chat me up for 30 minutes before anyone else gets out of bed.  Then there is the struggle to get Stacey and Grace to actually get out of bed and get moving for the day.  Add in the morning rush to get everyone dressed, ready, and out the door on time and you would be amazed that we are never really late.  Throw in a few fussy girls some days, a husband who likes to egg them on, and you have a typical morning at the Smith House.  "I don't want to wear those pants," Ella will say.  "But my show is not over yet," can be heard from Grace.  "Girls I am getting ready to go and I will leave you home," chimes in Stacey. 

When the girls were just babies I stopped wear jewelry because as I was feeding them they would choke me while playing with it.  On the positive, four years later I feel like I just got a bunch of new jewelry since it has not seen the light of day in so long.  I have been to work with spit-up on my clothes (yeah that is fun to arrive and realize that, why could I not have noticed before leaving the house so that I could change).  There has been toothpaste on the back of my pants from the hug I got before walking out the door (any mom knows what I am talking about here).  One look and you know I am a working mom.  Given my career, I always have a suit at work and prior to the girls never had a need to use it.  Now, I use that black suit jacket more then any other piece of clothes I own.  As I was finishing writing this, I even looked down to see the peanut butter on my shirt from making the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches this morning and now have the peanut butter and jelly song in my head (thanks Grace for that one). 

So next time you see a woman who is not 100% put together, just realize that she most likely has kids and home and just performed a miracle to get them out the door and where everyone needed to be.  In fact, you might be witness to the miracle that she is dressed at all.  Despite the hectic mornings, the not 100% good looks each day, and the morning rush hour that starts before the cars, I would not give up the morning hugs and kisses and the sweet wave good bye for anything.

Holiday Break

I am very lucky that as a working mom I have a job that still gives me a Christmas break.  Don't miss understand, I still get vacations, Thanksgiving break, spring break, and random holidays, but Christmas break is a whole different monster. 

I had a great plan of things that I was going to get accomplished in my time off.  My last day of work was on a Thursday and after picking the girls up from preschool we hit the grocery store, along with about 500 other people :).  I let the girls stay home from the sitters on Friday since Stacey had off and we could all sleep in.  Ella had other plans to kick off our vacation and got up at 5:30 a.m.  Monday we all stayed home to enjoy more family time (i mean really like three days 24/7 together was not enough).  By Tuesday I was ready to get everyone out of the house and get started on my to do list.  While productive for two days, but Thursday I was tired and thought I would let the girls stay home from preschool and sleep in.  Ella struck again, but at least Stacey had to go to work and got up with her so I got to sleep till about 6:45 a.m.  I had already told the babysitter they would not be there Friday and so here we were in for three more days at home together. 

I have never been so ready to start back to work on Monday and get a little time to myself (ok well I know it is work, but time away makes you want to be home more i know it does).  It gave me a deep appreciation to all the stay at home moms and just confirmed for me that I can not be one of you. 

Overall, it was great to spend some quality family time together and have some fun in the process.  While not even half my to do list was accomplished, there was lots of snuggling, jammie time (wait for that blog next week), and laughs! 

Here are a few highlight photo:

The girls got new princess dress up items and Grace loved it!

Ella with her new build a bear thanks to all the birthday and Christmas gift cards

Stacey making a cognac cream sauce for our steaks on New Years Eve
Yes it is supposed to flame up like that

Yes he wears Micky PJS thanks to the girls getting them for him for Christmas last year and yes he wants to kill me for it each time he puts them on and yes I just laugh each time